Taking care of Business

It's been over a year since my last tattoo, and I'm getting my pay in a few hours. Safe to say I already have a tattoo appointment this week, and safe to say I have no idea what I'm getting yet. The thing is that I have a million ideas, and even a few sketches, but I just cannot decide on anything.

I will maybe even get my "Gangster rap made me do it" tattoo that day, even tho I really was trying to save it for a more special occasion. But fuck it. I've never been known as a person that's really good at saving. Or a person that's even capable of saving for that matter.

Smile more, it makes you look happy.

I just got to work, and the coffee(hot chocolate+espresso+espresso) I made, doesn't really taste as it should. Sometimes the coffee machine gets broken you know, and then it just spews out water with some shady-ass color. The fact that I mix different ones, makes it even harder to tell if I got a real coffee or just bullshit.

I've also eaten my own weight in fast food the last couple of days, but that did not stop me from having pizza for lunch. Ever since Nicky Minaj's Anaconda got out, I've been subconsciously trying to get a ghetto booty of my own. No, I'm just kidding, I'm only in it for the Pizza. And Burgers. And Toast, Pancakes and Doughnuts. Fuck yes.

Since last time I've also taken a "Which Scandinavian Country Do You Belong In?"-Quiz, and lost. How do you loose a Quiz? You get "You should live in Sweden!" as your final result. Maaan. This also reminded me I have to color my hair again, and soon. My hair has the same color as my coffee did this morning, yellow-brown-ish, and I am so sick of it.

The last few days I've also been living at my friends house. When they have a penthouse with enough beds for everyone, and no one has work, then no one ends up going home, and we just hang out for ever. I love it, and it reminds me so much of late summer nights in Norway growing up, where we would just crash wherever and just drive around for hours and never go to sleep. And we did, and its been great.

 My friends just asked if I wanted to join Bakermat after work. Sure, why not. 

Shoes makes me happy. I'm superficial. Whatever.

Every time I wear heels at work, there's always someone who asks "How can you walk in those shoes all day?" And to be honest, and if everyone would like to know, it got a hell of a lot easier to walk in heels when you stopped thinking of them as a piece of clothing. They are now seen as my feet extensions, and its working out great for us.

It takes a fair amount of trust to be able to put one foot a meter in front of you, and then land perfectly on the piece of plastic/wood/leather attached under it, without bending your knees or stumbling. You have to trust that the shoe will stay there, and not slip away or do anything crazy. But once you have established that kind of relationship with your shoes, then its piece of cake. You should actually spend some time getting to know your shoes. Ask them how their day was like more often.

I love my shoes, even tho I use my favorite pair every day till they are broken down. I am metaphorically speaking a serial dater and a player when it comes to shoes. But who the fuck cares, it's not like they are gonna be upset about it. Or?

Not even I can find a way to stop the storm

In Malta we have an annual storm in September every year. It's basically the first time it rains in months, and when it rains it pours. Literally. Since this is a small Island in the middle of the Mediterranean, it's gets pretty flooded, and two years ago it rained for 6 hours straight, and after that I had to swim a little to get home. And it took 3 hours. True story.

When I checked the sky today before getting dressed, it was a little cloudy, but at the time I got half way to work, it had started to raining like shit. And it's like the a really harsh wake up call from the summer, in form of a big, fat, wet bitch slap right in the face. There's no other way of explaining it other than it fucking sucks. 

I'm still in denial regarding this, and I think I will stay in denial until the storm blows over. Or till this season blows over. This blows, that's for sure, in more ways than one as well.

Let's have a toast for the douchebags, assholes and Kanye.

Today has been a fairly productive day. Did some Caffeine shock therapy when I got to work, which basically means drinking espresso shots till your brain is vibrating. Till now it has only resulted in me going to the bathroom 40 times the last hour, but it's OK. I have also doubled my contacts since yesterday. I'm on fire and caffeine and it's really nice combination.

I've also listened to Kanye West all day, and came to the realization that I really like his music. He is the biggest asshole I know, but creativity vise, I fucking love this dude. It's not only his music that's likable either, this movie is like a long-ass fucking music video, but with more songs, and it's so great.

I don't think Kanye West lives in the real world with you and me.

I'm coming home again.

Did I ever get the chance to tell you how beautiful my home town is? Did I ever get the chance to even realize it? I don't think so. I think I ran off way too fast to really appreciate it. But I do miss the cold sometimes, even when I'm wearing summer clothes in October here in Malta.

To be honest, Norway is beautiful. It's cold, but very beautiful. People in Norway are the same come to think of it. Cold but beautiful. There are of course some exceptions to this rule, in form of both ugly and awesome people, but most Norwegians are so entitled, self-proclaimed and "important". Fucking hell, I don't really miss the place that much any more. But I would like to go home on a rather short visit. See some friends, laugh a lot, eat kebab and hug my family. 


And then go home. To Malta.

Fuck everything that doesn't make you happy.

I'm happy today. Not because I'm like this by default, but because I chose to be, every second of the day. I wanted to be happy, so I am. Either you control your feelings, or your feelings control you.

You probably won't be truly happy, until you happiness only depend on your choice. If your mood depends on other people or on things happening around you, then there's no guarantee you'll ever be happy. This especially goes for the people who be like:

"I am a nice person, but my mood depends on you".

No. Let me tell you something, if you are a bitch to people around you, even tho they are assholes, then you're a bitch. It's as simple as that. You cannot treat people you don't like badly, and then claim to be a saint. But then again, your mood changing after how other people are, should be karma enough for you. Have fun with that.

"Treat everyone with kindness, even those who are rude to you, not because they are nice, but because you are."

An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind. We allow cruelness and evil to live on, when we only give what we get. The world is unfair, that's it. There is no way around that fact, so if all the people who has been wronged, start doing wrong themselves, there would be nothing but wrong in this world for sure.

So don't justify being mean just because someone was mean to you. You are not the karma police. 

Happy birthday and happy sunburn.

This weekend was great. I still haven't recovered yet, but for once it was worth drinking alcohol four days in a row. Ok, so I partied all night and slept all day the first two days, but I still managed to go outside on Saturday and Sunday.

On Saturday I was in this cuties Birthday, which was hilarious and on a boat. She looks like the Maltese version of Jennifer Lawrence, and is almost as cool as me.

On Sunday, I was at a pool party and pretty much laid in the sun all day. I think I fell asleep several times, which you probably can see in the picture taken a little later on. I got a little sunburned, so everything went a little better than expected.

My memory is no good so I have to live for the moment.

End of summer vacation

In 4 hours I'm starting my only summer vacation this year. I didn't really plan for it to happen, but all of a sudden I have 4 days off over a weekend. I am going to two "Summer Closing" parties this weekend, and even tho I hate the fact that Summer's "over", the fact that I am actually off makes it kinda OK anyways.

I have quite the busy schedule the next few days to be honest, and it's all fun and games. Fuck yes living in Malta, fuck yes for something happening every second of the Summer and fuck yes there's still a little summer left.

Guess what I'm doing Sunday!

Art should be loud as fuck.

David Choe - Artist, Film Maker, Secret Facebook Millionaire and All Around Badass. At one point he is describing his life and says "This is some Disneyland shit, this is not the real world". And that inspires me. I have watched this documentary so many times, and every time I wish I could live my life like that. And he is crazy. The good kind I suppose, but still. This dude is so rad, that there's nothing thats more important to do right now, than to watch his documentary. So I found the trailer for you, enjoy.

(The whole documentary is on youtube as well. Click here to see it)

And he is probably one of my biggest inspirations when it comes to art. I've never seen someone who is this determent and just straight forward when it comes to making art. It seems like he is thinking and acting at the same time, an he is doing a great job at it. He just starts like the planning part takes place in another dimension. There is an honesty to his work that takes my breath away and there is so many details that you don't really notice at first, but they have a whole life of its own over there even tho you didn't see it at first.

Baby I'm wasted

Baby I'm wasted All I wanna do is drive home to you Baby I'm faded All I wanna do is take you downtown Baby I'm wasted All I wanna do is drive home to you Baby I'm faded All I wanna do is take you downtown Baby I'm wasted All I wanna do is drive home to you Baby I'm faded All I wanna do is take you downtown Baby I'm wasted All I wanna do is drive home to you Baby I'm faded All I wanna do is take you downtown Baby

I have a new favorite song and it is insane. You need to listen to it loud as fuck and preferably on great speakers. You'll understand when you hear it I promise. Also I am definitely gonna get smashed and listen to this Crooker Megamix the following days. Oh my effin God. I need to party now. Today.

Luckily for me, my friend's birthday is today, so I have a good reason to go. As always.

Winter is Coming

My French bulldog is back with it's actual owner/family now, and apparently my French flatmate is getting his cat back. I'm thrilled. More exited than I've been in a while. It's like getting my own cat, but without the responsibility. I would love to have a cat more than anything, except my freedom. So this arrangement works out perfectly.

Also I've been kinda bummed out due to the fact that winter is coming. Again. Like how did this even happen? Last I checked it was June and not September. One or two months left of summer and that's it. No more swimming comfortable in the Ocean until next April. No more pool hang until next May. And definitely no more "one piece of clothing to work"-days until next year.

However, sitting inside for a few months when you have a cat isn't half bad. It's actually great. And there are actually some other things with this season that doesn't make me wanna kill myself. So this is how I will survive these few months coming our way soon:

1. Beanies.
Even tho I still wear beanies during the summer, I cannot wait to wear them without the weird looks, and the sweaty girls on the bus stop emphasizing  to their friend that it is actually 30 degrees outside, while looking at me with the famous "it smells like shit"-expression on her stupid face.

2. Jewelry.
Ever been swimming in a pool with fake gold accessories? Ever gotten tan lines on your fingers and wrists? Ever burned yourself after touching jewelry that's been lying in the sun? Yeah, that's what I thought.

3.Anything Leather.(Read: Everything Leather)

4. Closed shoes/Boots.
Because all my open shoes gives me blisters except my heels.

5. Over-sized Sweaters.

This will replace the summer dress, which is the chillest item of clothing ever. Thank God this is acceptable and thank God I moved from Norway.

6. Underwear.

Really, who wears underwear in the summer? Not me, at least the times I can get away with it. Ps. I spend my free time in the summer mostly in Bikinis. 

7. Lip stick.

Because if Malta's humidity doesn't fuck it up, then the pool or the ocean will. Or when your drinking something which you have to do all the time. Just face the facts, lipstick is a fall/winter/spring thing.

8. Stockings.

Because fuck yes. The only problem is that Maltese people have in general a lot shorter feet than I do. So I get knee-socks at the best.

First you get a swimming pool full of liquor, then you dive in it

I was invited to this "End of Summer" party just now, where it said "241 Frozen Margaritas" on the poster. Like, does that mean there will be 241 Frozen Margaritas? In which case, I'll take them all please, and how are we getting more for everyone else?

But no. 241 Frozen Margaritas apparently means that you'll get two for the price of one. Which is great too, if you're actually willing to pay for alcohol, which I'm not. But what I really can't stand is when people use numbers instead of words. I am sorry, but I am not coming to your party no matter how many Frozen Margaritas you might have.

The same goes for Twitter. Fuck you and your Margaritas, Twitter! Haha no, but seriously, only allowing it's users to write 140 characters are affecting us people to try to explain as much as we can, with as few characters as possible. And I am all up for explaining things using fewer words, in a simpler way, but when people just ruthlessly replacing words with numbers to shorten it down, then I'm not happy. And also, Twitter can suck my dick.

Smells like teen spirit

I walked home from work yesterday, and it really smelled like late Summer, almost Fall. I just love when you can smell the seasons. And it reminded me of last year when my best friend was in Malta to visit me for 18 days last September. And as I was walking home, it smelled just like back then. After a while it kinda changed to smelling like pizza, which reminded me of her in a way too.

I miss her every day. But what's weird is that I don't really miss her as a person. Because I don't really see her as a person. She's kinda a part of me. And it feels so strange being away from a part of yourself. I am pretty sure she is my soul mate. We have like a Jedi mind trick connection of some kind, and I wish everyone could have a best friend like that.

But I have not seen her in a year, and it sucks.

To be unforgettable, one must always be different.

Some people are a bit more special than others, that's for sure. I saw this video of the unforgettable Joan Rivers, and the way she talks is reminding me of Sienna Millers portray of Edie Sedwick in the movie Factory girl. I love that movie to bits. I love the way she just effortlessly adds "you know?" in the end of the sentence. Sienna says the same, in the same exact way, and it adorable. It's like she knows all the secrets of the world and is acting like you know it as well.

I love meeting people that fascinates me. I love being around them. I love when people don't try to be anything, they just are that way. Special. They think in a whole different way than most people. And that's why this movie is one of my all time favorites. It tells the story of a person who stood out and thought differently. Who was special. And I love how they portrayed her. Beautiful. 

If you do something with your whole heart and it’s a mistake, you can live with that.

So it's been a week since I got my pay check, and I am already (almost, and as good as) broke again. I am celebrating by drinking blue Gatorade out of a wine glass. Classy with a big C. I'm mostly drinking it out of a glass because something gross made its way from the bottom of my purse, into the hole you're supposed to drink out of, but it still counts.

Ok, so I actually drink out of glasses so rarely that when I do, it feels like a special occasion or like I'm celebrating something, so why not celebrate that I again this month spent all my money 3 weeks before I get more. I honestly don't know whether to laugh or cry, so I'm choosing to laugh. You should always not know whether to laugh or cry, so you can choose laughing every time. 

“If you do something with your whole heart and it’s a mistake, you can live with that.”

I read this quote today, and this is basically how I justify my actions. I hate regretting, and realized that you can't live your life trying to NEVER do regrettable things, because you will sometimes do stupid shit. But if you want to not regret things, you just have to stop regretting them. You will always make some mistakes a long the way, but that's what life is all about. Fuck up, and move on. And forgive people when they fuck up. At least the first time they do it. The second time is a choice, and if they choose to hurt you, then fuck them.

Also, Fuck everything that doesn't make you happy.

And it's not just living with what you have done, it's also a lot of knowing beforehand what is the right choices for you, and knowing which one will be easier to live with. Because you have to learn from past mistakes, but not dwell on them. It's simple really, don't do stupid shit twice. Because the first time you do something, your kind of new to that shit and maybe don't quite know what the fuck you are doing, but the second time you do something, then you are choosing to do so, and you know what is going to happen. I don't get people who do dumb shit over and over again, and still complains that the same shit keeps happening because of the dumb shit they did in the first place.

But it's also about standing for what you believe in. I can be held responsible for everything I do. I try to never talk badly about anyone, and I rarely talk negative about anything, so that it's easier for me to stand for everything I say. Like who is going to not like you because you like something? That must be one uncool sucker unless you like someone with a social status on the Adolf Hitler side of the graph. And while we are talking about it, I love talking positive about other people, especially when they are not there. But that is a choice I make everyday. I choose to be positive and kind instead of a backstabbing bitch. Sometimes that bites me in the ass, but I can live with that.

Ps. I apologize for all the cursing, I know the text would have been shorter if I removed it, but what the hell. Live and let live. Don't spend your life thinking so much of the past, but rather how to do things better right now. 

Coffee nap

Two words, nightshift and lunch. If you have a decent alarm clock and enough self control, why not go raid the coffee machine, before napping on a couch somewhere?

Did you know that when you drink coffee, it doesn't completely kick in before 30 minutes later? And that the less you think about in those 30 minutes, the more the caffeine will work. Combine this with a power nap of 30 minutes and you have the perfect answer to all your problems.

You're welcome.

Dancin's what makes me whole

I'm off work today, and started my morning swimming in my backyard, aka the Mediterranean. It was quite windy today, so the Ocean wasn't really that calm as I would of hoped, but the waves were really big, so on my inflatable mattress that was kinda fun.

The waves were so big actually, that I wasn't really affected of them at all. I love how the Ocean kinda teases you that way. It's like saying "I could easily fuck you up, but I'll let you chill instead". So I pretty much chilled with my toes in the Mediterranean all morning.

And then I'm going dancing tonight. I've listened to this song on repeat for days now and I just need to go out dancing. And luckily for me, I'm having my weekend right now. This might be your Wednesday, but this is my Saturday, and I am definitely going dancing tonight. Dancin' till the break of dawn.

Yes, I'm a motherfucking French

"Smacking chicks and licking faces"

I just moved into a new apartment. My 15th one in Malta (at least). My new flatmates are French, and with my best friends dog who I'm watching at the moment, being a French bulldog, I feel like the universe is sending me a message. "Learn some fucking French", or something like that.

And then I found Stromae. Or found and found.. I remember him from the time everyone would play Alors on danse everwhere at all times of the day. But I've listened to his other songs now, and what the actual fuck. He is great. He is better than great. He is amazing. And the lyrics are insane. I am a lyric person, and I have to admit that French lyrics are in a whole different league.

Soo I decided that I have to learn French now.

And I am off to a great start as well. I have listened to his music which only has french lyrics for 8 hours a day since last week, so I figure I'll talk/understand French at the end of the year or something.

The dog is also staying with me till the 9th when my friend comes home from Greece, meaning that I'm basically responsible for picking up all her poop for the following week as well as making sure she doesn't eat anything dangerous and stuff. I promise that it's more fun that it sounds like. I also have to trick her out the door every morning, seeing as she is a little afraid of the door. She is also afraid of paper bags, suitcases and high heels. She's probably a little scared of her food too, as I only see her eating in the dark.

Pacha also looks exactly like this, maybe not as calm and relaxed, but just as beautiful..

...Until she poops in the middle of the only pedestrian shopping street in Sliema. Which she does every day, since it's the only place she goes to the toilet. Lots of love.